hi Jeff,

I am enjoying your journal a lot- I came here from the superhero site.
One small problem though: whenever I click on any item in the site, it goes all weird- the text gets overlaped, and even if I refresh the page, it doesn't get better. I work on a Windows 98, IE 5.00 if that helps.
It might be intentional, you never know :-)
But I thought I should tell you just in case.

All the best, Adina

Adina, put on the wig and update your browser.

Could someone fill me in on what this "superhero" site is that people are coming from? I feel like the world has moved on without me and I am sadly left with only a bag full of onions to keep my company.

Strangely, I find myself reading Orson Scott Card's The Speaker for the Dead? Has anyone else here read it?

Christian,
Nothing wrong with onions, full of vitamins.

http://www.superherodesigns.com/journal/

Lived in caves with gypsies?! Rode bikes profesionally?! Bullshit. What was/is your cat. rating Jeff, you must have one, 'specially if you were racing. Proffesionally? Who sponsored you? Microsoft? McDonalds? You live a lie. It must stop. Tell this poor girl the truth. In caves with gypsies, Sheesh. Yeah, if you consider drywalled, 2X4ed, stucccoed walls with a volvo in the drive way and people that drink starbucks, gypsies and caves. You got no balls. Christian, sorry to bring you into this but... Christian's got more balls, he brought a child into this world, THe sacrifice of time, self, dreams... for what is essentially an unknown. Child could grow up to be an ax murderer, a Bill Clinton, a postal worker. ( child in general not yours Christian) :) jeff, from the person I knew to this. Slip slidin' away, slip sliiidin' awaaaay, the nearer your destination, the more you're slip slidin' away.
John Rensing ( a superhero to the core)
P.S. No 'Sound of silence' jokes people. Doesn't take any thought and is predictable.

out of curiousity john....what is it that you do with the rest of your time that makes you berate jeff for living his life how he wants to...and writing what he pleases on HIS website, not yours. i'm curious as to why it pleases you so to do this.....
in defending him i know i'm inviting a long line of insults on your part, but what the hell....

What makes you think I would insult you delphina?
my track record shows that I rarely insult anyone on this forum with the exception of pitcher. With that said, I don't believe that the truth can be an insult. It is what it is. And, actually you did not defend him at all, you just stated your perceptions of him. To defend him would be to state why what he does is OK. I can't insult you until I know you.:)
And Christian, I would love to hear your opinion on The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged.
ever lovin John. Ta.

Christian-
i read that book years ago (after Ender's Game) and quite enjoyed it.

john, i understand your point, but why the constant insistence on spouting your 'truth' at jeff? why oh why? unless you're being personally harmed by it or have taken it upon yourself to root out lies wherever you judge them to thrive...
i forget who said it, some buddhist or whomever (my lack of notes/resources kills my credibility, doesn't it? obviously i'm making this up): 'the wise man cannot be angered, because what is true, he acknowledges as true, and what is not is simply beneath his notice.'

leading by example, not railing judgement. what an idea.

What if Christian is actually Jeff's alter ego? (an inner critic of sorts)

Sorry, I meant John (not Christian, he is the nice one.)

Keri,

What an interesting thought... do you suppose they are one in the same, or more like nemisis (sp?) offering yin and yang to the universe?

Christian is the earth: solid and formidable. The soil that squeezes the space between the box lid and the sky.

Jefferson is a tree: branches twisting and climbing, stretching through the fog.

We, collectively, are just a bunch of squirrels looking for nuts to store against leaner times.

Or possibly we are the latter, hiding from the squirrels.

Sometimes lying upon the earth is enriching, and sometimes sitting on a branch in a tree is terrifying, yet both of these things are better than lying down in a box under both of them.

I welcome your venom.

were john my alter ego, i would be rather embarassed and would have made him leave the room long ago, for he grew tiresome ever so quickly. of course we all have our demons in life, but my dark moments of questioning myself, are far more graceful than this. to me, john is a sad, sad man. i typically refrain from commenting, as {although he doesn't seem to be capable of understanding this} i don't care about his opinions.

first, he is factually incorrect, and secondly, he hardly knows me; he is an aquaintance from years ago, and i think it's humorous that he feels he knows so much about me and my life. strange, but funny nonetheless. i'm not sure why he comes here, but then i don't really care. i dislike his energy and what he writes so much, that i've often thought of making him incapable of accessing the site, but then i am reminded of my earlier words on censorship. it is to me a great reminder, that we must be tolerant in our communities.

john of course has asked me on several occasions to 'prove' something or other {as i'm sure he would say regarding the things andrea wrote} but i have no need to do that. andrea did mis-state one thing {i did not cycle professionally, [they would have left me in the dust!!] but trained with a bunch of cat one and two racers} but it doesn't really matter to me. i have few insecurities about the way i live my life, and therefore don't need to 'prove' anything. sometimes, i wish i could say that i have no insecurities, but that would indeed be dishonest, and life is full of so many questions. like the hairline crack in my flamenco guitar. how did that get there? why is it growing? a problem that i will finally begin resolving this morning, as i have an appointment with a local luthier. i suppose in many ways, our time here is like little fissures and cracks that we learn to repair and move on.

Now I know why I enjoy coming here. My heart becomes full and heavy at the same time. The contrast is necessary. Thank you Jeff. You are full of goodness. I didn't mean to imply otherwise.

i agree w/ kerri and amy. the forces of yin & yang present before us this…as one man grows richer w/ internal beauty, nature balances itself with another man bereft of this gift. the second man is absent of dignity and consumed by envy. angel vs. demon. good vs. bad.

the demon’s voice is all noise, and noise proves nothing but malicious jealousy.

maybe it's me, but this seems to be missing the point. yin and yang, or angel and devil if you like, exist in their connection to each other. their interdependence. not vs. each other. without one, the other wouldn't be. it seems oversimplification to label jeff as one vs. rensing the other. the dichotomy of good vs. evil is not the same as yin and yang. and for the most part it's an illusion altogether. jeff and john both have good and evil in them, just like me. or you. or christian. whomever. i guess suggesting that john was made this way by nature to counteract jeff's spirit seems totally ludicrous to me. like neo vs. smith. i don't think so.

maybe it's me, but this seems to be missing the point. yin and yang, or angel and devil if you like, exist in their connection to each other. their interdependence. not vs. each other. without one, the other wouldn't be. it seems oversimplification to label jeff as one vs. rensing the other. the dichotomy of good vs. evil is not the same as yin and yang. and for the most part it's an illusion altogether. jeff and john both have good and evil in them, just like me. or you. or christian. whomever. i guess suggesting that john was made this way by nature to counteract jeff's spirit seems totally ludicrous to me. like neo vs. smith. i don't think so.

sorry about posting twice, my twitchy mousepad.

HEh heh heh. My stomach hurts from laughing. It is such a wholesome pain. I would guess that none of you are even remotely aquainted with yin and yang. And why would Andrea have misquoted you Jeff? That's not the kind of info someone not familiar with racing would have created on their own.from just riding to proffesional racing? In my never so humble opinion. And I laugh. The fact that you even considered blocking me from accessing this site speaks volumes. I hope you haven't broken anything because of me. I hope to meet everone here, in passing, and to charm the pants off of all of you. But based on what I've seen, it shouldn't be to difficult. Ooh, with one stroke I have insulted everybody. Me and my big fingertips. Now for more hubris. I am married to a vet. as in veterinarian. that give me at least 14 karma points. I truly love animals as evidenced by my huge menagerie, 27 karma points, I am even more into plants. I collect orchids and sanseverias and everything else and love to talk plants, 32 karma points. 9 times out of 10 if I see a dog running loose on the street I will attempt to chase it down and return it to its rightful owner (most dogs don't want to be caught for anyone that hasn't attempted this). 62 karma points. I have stopped 4 or 5 times to help stranded motorists in the last few years, 17 karma points. I am more concerned with my wifes orgasm than with mine, 19 karma points (137 if you ask her). I could go one but I'm blushing.
I am a nice guy, I'm just just rooting out lies where ever I percieve them (wink, wink, Dave).
PAID FOR BY THE COALITION TO STOP RATHER, QUITE, PERHAPS.

Oh and that's 171 karma point if you weren't counting (289 if you ask my wife).
Karma is a point system isn't it?
John.

I came here again to simply lend my apologies. It was eating me up last night for having said what I said. I do not know John or his situation. So I bear no right to comment, and thus retract and withhold my judgment. I guess I reacted so quickly b/c it baffles and disturbs me greatly to discover that there exists a person who can expend so much energy in projecting his horrendous animosity towards an individual who, from what I know, is so kind-hearted, compassionate, and noble. How he may have wronged you, I do not know. But again, I am sorry to pass any judgment. My motto in life is to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and utmost respect until the person gives me a reason (directly) to think otherwise.

Jeff hasn't wronged me in any way. I don't comprehend why he would need to have wronged me for me to comment on what he types here. Or what I percieve him to be leading others to believe.
Yin and Yang are not essentially opposites for you newage junkies or intellectual wannabes. THey cannot exist without each other. I could exist just fine with out pitcher and I'm sure vice versa. hee hee. A local yocal recently commented on critical thinking, I can't imagine he sees any in this site. This site feel so empty with out me.
21 posts most of which comment on me. I just wish you all would think about what your typing a bit more. I miss T and Xian posting, well thought out and a dash of humor. If no one here sees any humor in what I post I feel sorry for you.
well looks life pitcher put up a new post so I gotta read it and go from there. See ya.
Love, hugs and kisses. John

i just wanted to tell you that your writing is amazing. i am a college student and have always dreamt of being able to assemble words an thoughts the way you do. you are quite an inspiration to me. i am also a big fan of your band. i just came acrossed it from the superhero site. the music and lyrics are wonderful.

Jeff, there is a quote that I love and I've been blessed to experience it on occasion. "A chief event of life is the day in which we have encountered a mind that startled us." (Emerson)

Finding your site and peering into your world is one of those occasions. Strange how it happened on a computer...usually it ignites with a random act of kindness or perhaps a glance and bow of the eyes...one artist acknowledging another. You're startling.