stretching out my ears. {internally} {sort of}
My habit of sleeping with earplugs began years ago, as an infrequent remedy to a noise situation. Don’t all habits begin with infrequency? I was living with a friend and his girlfriend in a rather small house. Sometimes, we all forgot that it was a very small house, and so I wore them now and then. next it was steve who would sometimes have his then three year old son around in the mornings. Or he would be fucking jenna. Both kept me awake. Earplugs. Then I moved in with Dana, who taught yoga at five o’clock in the morning. More importantly, she was not the quietest person at five o’clock in the morning. We lived in a small place with a loft, and all manner of things bothered me. There was no door we could shut to escape each other’s little noisemakings, and so the earplugs continued. Then it was the tent in mike’s sideyard, in downtown davis. {self-explanatory} Then it was Tina and her goddamn cat. A cat, which in hindsight, was without question the most despicable domesticated animal, I have ever encountered. Then it was the back of my truck, and various people’s couches for a while. {again, self-explanatory} Then it was the house with Natalie and Mira. Good god that was awful. Aside from their general lack of acknowledgement that someone was actually sleeping in the house, the overly loud, overly bad music, was a nuisance. Not to mention natalie’s complete and total psychological unraveling, which was incidentally directed at me. Then it was the flat with Pam, and Meghan, and Lucy, which was actually, perfectly, beautifully quiet. But of course, the room where I slept was right on the busy road, and full of windows, thus quite loud. Then it was the bike trip.
Now…..i am at this point, perfectly situated to cease this practice {with the exception of a terribly chubby, fluffy, immeasurably cute cat, which unfortunately also happens to be terribly AMAZINGLY, {a wonder of science really} determined. Which simply means that he {I won’t name any names} will go to great {read: obsessive and completely insane} lengths to lick any living thing. While the licking itself can be stopped by locking him out of the room, the incessant {read: relentlessly for hours} whining does not stop.
Honestly though, the main problem is that it became a bonafide habit somewhere in the area of three years ago, and habits are difficult to break, especially when they result in the loss of sleep.
I justify this, by telling myself that as far as habits go, it really isn’t all that bad, but here is where we come to the current delimna I am having with the problem. Aside from wishing to be completely adaptable when it comes to sleep, possessing the ability to sleep anywhere, on any surface, whenever I am tired. To be able to sleep without pillow or blankets on dirt or cement. On my back even. With no covers between my knees, and none nice and snug around my scrotum. None. But I am not that guy. I am the guy who wears earplugs even while camping in the woods, in the middle of nowhere, making himself thusly more susceptible to mauling by bear, or murder by wacko, as he won’t hear them coming. But the true problem, the reason I write all of this {as I was saying before} is ultimately because I have begun to feel lately when I stick my pinky in my ear to itch them, that the cavity has grown larger. Of course my only explanation for this {as irrational as it sounds considering how soft the damn earplugs are} is that the earplugs are stretching out my ears. shit. Is everything bad for us? So do I continue to enlarge my ears and sleep like a baby, or finally sleep amidst the noise of the earth? Sometimes the small questions of life seem so important. Green tea or black? This bottle of wine or that one? I could go on and on, but that’s a different story altogether. Cheers to the hard ones to break. Cheers.
oh yes...and if you live in the states {or are american living elsewhere like me} you may register to vote by clicking the little button on the top left corner of this page. don't get me started.
Posted by jeff pitcher at October 6, 2004 02:04 PM
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I understand this post. I wore earplugs incessantly for 10 years. It's the comfort thing of having something in your ear blocking out the anticipation of sound, of something, anything, waking you up. No, I don't think plugs can expand your ear. It's a tunnel that isn't negotiable. The only way I've found to dissolve my dependency was to have a fan going. I'm a fan addict now -- the cool wind blowing on my face, the quiet hum of a simple sound of air. That means that now I have to carry a fan around with me on roadtrips and when I have sleepovers. Much harder than earplugs. So maybe they aren't so bad.
Posted by: daphne at October 6, 2004 04:29 PM
i only used earplugs when i was studying in Perth, cos my room-mate and coursemate snored so loud, for about 10 months.
i bought a pack that had 3 pairs; lost 1 pair (god knows how), used 1 pair, and i still hv the last pair in my drawer, since 2000!! lol...
Posted by: jennir at October 7, 2004 04:47 AM
Never wore earplugs - only time I did was to a Prince concert where I was standing front row in front of the two rather large speakers that Prince himself got up on top of to dance on.
Please do get started on this year's election/politics. There has been sooooo many new people to register to vote this year.
Posted by: Jen at October 7, 2004 05:30 AM
So I am curious to know, since you seem to be quite the connoisseur; what type you prefer? Are they the foam barrel ones, the silicone squish into shape ones, the waxy also fun to form ones, or the (to me) scary plastic ribbed cone shaped ones? Or have you come up with something altogether different as an option? I know it's a matter of personal preference but hmmm...
Posted by: kitten at October 7, 2004 10:01 AM
Funny that you think it's most ridiculous to wear earplugs while camping. That's the only place I wear them. Burrowing bugs, &c.
Posted by: Leah at October 7, 2004 12:36 PM
to answer your question [adding that i giggled quite a bit while reading your querry] i am indeed rather particular about which plugs. foam. without question. the waax ones i tried years ago, while swimming quite a bit, and simply cannot imagine sleeping in them. the strange, ribbed, plastic ones, make me feel a bit creeped out. they are the earwigs of the earplug world. {pun intended} now, as for the foam. i do not like the really tubular foam ones...not only do they fit only marginally well, but their sound blocking out capabilities are mediocre. i go for the shaped {tapered} foam ones, that look something like a missile. there seem to be different densities as well. degrees of squishiness. years ago, at Longs Drugstore in Davis, California i found the best i have ever used. they came in what looked like a large pill container. after the first night, i went back and bought two more jars. sadly, they ran out and i've not been able to find them since. somehow, they were the PERFECT degree of squishiness. PERFECT. but, in about two weeks, i will be driving through davis, and i will find myself in that drugstore. indeed.
Posted by: jefferson pitcher at October 7, 2004 03:57 PM
hehehe. I took up wearing earplugs this summer on a flight out to San Francisco just to help me sleep on the plane. i had never had a better sleep, so i wore them the whole week i was out there. and on the flight home. and i am just now stopping, despite the fact that i live in the basement of a house in a little country town with no noise whatsoever. it is just so comforting!!
so good to know im not alone!
xoxoxo
eMiLy
Posted by: Emily at October 7, 2004 11:03 PM
thank you so much for answering my curiosity, it is a rather personal thing, but i do believe in gathering information from the experts ;)
i have as of yet to try the missiles, the next time i am at the Long's near me in Oakland(which i call the SUPER Longs since it has everything imaginable and then some-) i will peruse the selection to see if something resembling your nirvana of earplugs is there, as i too would like to experience enlightenment in the silence...
and i appreciated the earwig pun although it made me both laugh and twitch/startle at the same moment...
Posted by: kitten at October 8, 2004 10:18 AM
What's the point of your crudeness?
Posted by: eman at October 8, 2004 01:47 PM
I smiled all the way through reading this post. I'm perhaps the world's lightest sleeper and took to wearing earplugs something like 20 years ago (yikes!) courtesy of a heavy breathing partner at the time. I've tried to break myself of the 'habit' a couple of times, but after lying awake for a few hours out come the plugs.
At risk of grossing out your readers, I have never had a feeling of 'stretching' of the ears but I do find that I can get a build up of impacted wax at times. Sorry, I know. GROSS.
Posted by: The Other Andrew at October 10, 2004 10:04 PM
