the proliferation of cellphones
{page from journal}
while i am enjoying my time here to myself, exploring and rambling about in the heat, i'm tired of my wife being 3000 miles away. it has grown tiresome.....actually, it grew tiresome several weeks ago, somewhere after the first twenty four hours. i am reminded of how much our concept of home and the tying of roots is related to the people we love. the suburban walls and bad carpet AND wondrous things of this town, feel temporary without her. and so i wait, clicking off the hours. reading. playing guitar. riding my bike. sitting in the backyard watching the hummingbirds spin and dart through the air.
tonight, Jacob Golden plays at old ironsides, a musician who used to inspire me so greatly that it was paralyzing. i wonder if i will feel as intimidated by his voice tonight as i used to in the past. as much as i know that i need to embrace MY voice and MY music, i find it difficult not to compare myself {don't all artists do this?} and i find it difficult to refrain from wishing sometimes {all of the time?} that i could sing like Jeff Buckley...and frankly, Jacob does sort of sing like Jeff Buckley. i think i've grown {i know i have} quite a bit since i saw him last, both internally {spirit} and externally {singing, songwriting, etc} and perhaps now i can listen and feel the music without judging myself. this is, i believe, on some level at the core of what all artists must do: fall in love with what they have been given, and embrace it completely, something i admire so much in my wife. lifelong work i believe.
three men sit at a table in green {not matching} baseball hats, smoking hand-rolled cigarettes. a grey haired woman in a purple tank top, flashes her buck teeth. laughing, she adjusts her wire rimmed glasses and tightens her lips. her eyes dart. somehow, her movement matches her light purple shirt. the man to my left wears all white, and of course, talks on his cellphone. people eat eggs and drink coffee. a man with green dreadlocks, eyeliner, and an amish looking beard drinks beer and talks on his phone. the world in the pink shirt with the dog, talks on her phone. the woman eating the bagel talks on her phone. a woman in a black skirt and grey shirt, paces the sidewalk as she talks. the proliferation of cellphones is dizzying. the whistles and bells. the beeping. i confess that it depresses me a bit.
Posted by jeff pitcher at August 12, 2005 12:09 PM
....................................
Wonderful ...i must check out Jacob Golden i think.
Posted by: venus at August 13, 2005 03:22 AM
Its really nice to know there are men out there like you who are soul searchers and love their wives and respect them. I wish I had such a someone in my own life. I seem to attract the opposite. Your site is very meaningful to me. thank you
Posted by: Holly at August 13, 2005 07:53 AM
I send this prayer out into Cyberspace that Lumpy Assdragon will turn over a new leaf and apologize for his nasty behavior. I pray that Lumpy Assdragon ("John Rensing") will awaken refreshed, plant a garden, put on a tutu and dance, breathe, meditate, write haiku, and paint his walls yellow. Lumpy Assdragon, you are going to be okay. You are deeply loved.
Posted by: Annie on Crack at August 13, 2005 08:10 AM
I recently went dancing at the club my girlfriend and I met at, only without her for she is traveling around the country with friends for six weeks. It wasn't the same at all. All I can do is read and write and bike to and from work and listen to music and count the days. I think of it as time to practice, to focus on things I've been too long neglecting. But fuck, it's hard.
Posted by: Dave at August 13, 2005 06:39 PM
Cell phones are only as annoying as the people who carry them; blame them, not the technology. I must admit that I love them as a means of easy and quick communication. They remind me of the good old "beam me up, Scotty" devices that fascinated me so much as a child watching Star Treck. I think we'll have to wait longer for the beaming, though.
I've been following Keri's weblog for a while; I really like her approach to life and creativity which is so inspiring even to non-artists like myself. She comes across as a very genuine and special person, I am not surprised you miss her so much. I wish you both all the best for your new chapter in California. :)
Posted by: Kerstin at August 13, 2005 08:14 PM
LumpyF!
Everyone wishes you well. You hang in there with yourself. Everyone here understands that you are projecting all of your slimy, icky gook onto Pitcher, and that with time and some really, really good and extremely high doses of electroshock therapy you will be good as new. I send you a huge hug and kiss LF. Now pull yourself together, turn off the computer if you have nothing nice to say, and go treat yourself to a little ice-cream cone. Maybe even a double scoop. xo
Posted by: LumpyF's Friend at August 16, 2005 10:30 AM
